Saturday, December 23, 2006

I Can Hear

My bipolar disorder has always leaned towards the hypomanic side. Since finally finding some stability, my wife pointed out something that she considers one of the most priceless benefits of my "recovery". I can finally hear. I can look my children in the eye, and hear what they are telling me. I have the patience to listen, and to find what they are telling me important enough to remember.

Believe me, it wasn't always this way. The past was somewhat of a maniacal blur.

7 comments:

Dream Writer said...

I could relate to this. I am not focused and I don't necessarily hear anything that anyone is saying...I am so out of tune.

Great that you are stable, and so focused that now you can "Hear" what others are saying and focused enough to listen..

Me...I am so in my own world that it goes right over my head!

Anonymous said...

Congrats! I'm glad to hear that you see the difference. I hate when I don't listen, makes me frustrated. But I feel good when I do listen. It's a change

marja said...

I've had the same problem of not hearing what others are saying, but I hadn't looked on it as a symptom of bipolar - but maybe now I can see it was, at least partially.

In "The Purpose Driven Life", Rick Warren talked about God being an example of "othercenteredness". That really struck home for me and has made me work extra hard to listen to others - but it's often a struggle still.

It's just that I have so much going on I want to talk about. Now that's mania.

I'm like you, Jon, mostly hypomanic. That translates into a lot of creative energy - not such a bad thing at all.

I've just discovered your blog and will look in often. Would like to get to know you better.

Jon said...

DW - Thanks for stopping back and commenting. It used to go right over my head, too, and still does at times. But more often than not, I can now actually listen and hear.

OccasionalConfusion - I appreciate you taking the time to leave a comment, and agree 100%, it makes me feel good to be able to listen also.

Marja - I really believe it was a symptom of my hypomanic personality. I was too wrapped up in ME, and didn't give the family the attention they deserved. It's still not perfect, but it's getting better. I've heard a lot about that book, and will have to read it sometime. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!

The Queen said...

This great Jon!! My husband has said the same thing about me when I am medicated...

Anonymous said...

Oh Wow!!

That is so beautiful!

I imagine that was a very meaningful moment...to receive that feedback from your wife, as it was for her to give it.

I also tend to live mostly in the hypomanic side, and I have had moments/discussions of the "you don't listen" (they are not my proudest moments...I try so hard to learn from them)

Congratulations to you Jon!!

Dancer

Jon said...

Queen - I understand, we don't seem to notice until it's pointed out. Then I wonder how much I really missed... Thanks so much for your comment.

Dancer - you absolutely understand. It was a great moment, but does make me feel bad that I missed so much for so many years.